Respect for Authority
So after having ranted about my life and waterpolo -guess I needed to get it out of my system-
I'm now sort of social again and realise there is more to the world then ME! (although in the end it is all about ME of course!)
I think it was brought on by my cross-cultural psychology class. No, that is not true, I realised it long ago, but all of a sudden I needed to put words to it. And come to think of it, I think reading a post on Rachels Blog reminded me of it as wel.
So I think it makes a big deal of difference how you were raised, but even if your community has different ideas and values your immediate family can still teach you! Yes I'm talking about Respect. Respect mostly for people around you. I believe there are some people that deserve a certain amount of respect. Yes, you're right, of course, everyone deserves respect, but I'm talking about those that deserve a little more!
I realise America is not the best example in haveing a society that is based on respect for people anymore but still, we are all people. In Enlgish, lacking a formal way to adress professors or the elderly leaves me really uncomfortable at times. "You" simply sounds wrong and they don't like me using professor or Mr, Mrs or Ms. Fine I can deal with that, but then the way people talk about teachers or deal with them leaves me flabbergasted sometimes. The same way it has always shocked me how teenagers can rant and curse at their parents. Sure you can be angry or upset, but there is things you just don't say!
I am for one, really free and open with my grandparents, I find it comfortable to talk to them about just about anything.. When my grandma once proudly showed me an e-mail from one of my cousins I realised they used a formal form in Dutch to adress them and all of a sudden I wondered if they had ever minded me being less formal. They didn't, they didnlt even realise it, but it reminded me that we are not all brought up in the same way. Not adressing people in a certain way doesn't neccesarily mean you have less respect, it might even create a certain amount of distance favourble for professors and the like, but I do think it is a way of showing that you respect people, even if they ask hyou afterwards to leave the foramlities away. I believe older people have earned that respect not only thought living longer and having more experience in life but also for the fact that they are the ones who made life for us possible, for developing what we now have and for making mistakes that we got to learn from. Teachers because they have knowledge and take time and effort to teach us, Grnadparents for the reasons above and because I love them!: "Ode to Grandparents" oh no offence there, Ode to my Parents too! ;)
But back to Authority: I think being in the USA has made me lose a little respect when it comes to authority. I realised this change when I was trying to write a formal letter in Dutch to a professor at the University of Utrecht and wondering if the way I was adressing him was not too formal. I eventually decided that I'd rather be too formal then not at all, but it felt wierd using ways of writing in Dutch that in Enlgish I do not. I do definitely think it depends a lot on who your are talking to and what you are talking about. I remeber flinching at a look from my waterpolo coach when I just joined the National Waterpolo team. Now however, 100 experiences later and three coaches down the line I find that I know more on the subject and have a bigger input and even though I have respect I will stand up for my own more often as well. When it comes to things that I do not know anything about or have no controll over I once again feel like the first day in my goal: "You are ******** here to block shots SO DO IT!" No questions asked, no if's or but's.
Certainly we both learned from that experience because there is such a thing as too much respect but, having come from there I believe people, aspecially in America, have a lot to catch up on. I believe if people had some more respect for starters for elders and also for everyone else around them there would be a lot less crime misunderstanding and other out of controll situations in the world and a lot less suffering.
And so she stated.
Music: Rasmus-Sail Away
Quote: "Respect a man, he will do the more." -James Howell
I'm now sort of social again and realise there is more to the world then ME! (although in the end it is all about ME of course!)
I think it was brought on by my cross-cultural psychology class. No, that is not true, I realised it long ago, but all of a sudden I needed to put words to it. And come to think of it, I think reading a post on Rachels Blog reminded me of it as wel.
So I think it makes a big deal of difference how you were raised, but even if your community has different ideas and values your immediate family can still teach you! Yes I'm talking about Respect. Respect mostly for people around you. I believe there are some people that deserve a certain amount of respect. Yes, you're right, of course, everyone deserves respect, but I'm talking about those that deserve a little more!
I realise America is not the best example in haveing a society that is based on respect for people anymore but still, we are all people. In Enlgish, lacking a formal way to adress professors or the elderly leaves me really uncomfortable at times. "You" simply sounds wrong and they don't like me using professor or Mr, Mrs or Ms. Fine I can deal with that, but then the way people talk about teachers or deal with them leaves me flabbergasted sometimes. The same way it has always shocked me how teenagers can rant and curse at their parents. Sure you can be angry or upset, but there is things you just don't say!
I am for one, really free and open with my grandparents, I find it comfortable to talk to them about just about anything.. When my grandma once proudly showed me an e-mail from one of my cousins I realised they used a formal form in Dutch to adress them and all of a sudden I wondered if they had ever minded me being less formal. They didn't, they didnlt even realise it, but it reminded me that we are not all brought up in the same way. Not adressing people in a certain way doesn't neccesarily mean you have less respect, it might even create a certain amount of distance favourble for professors and the like, but I do think it is a way of showing that you respect people, even if they ask hyou afterwards to leave the foramlities away. I believe older people have earned that respect not only thought living longer and having more experience in life but also for the fact that they are the ones who made life for us possible, for developing what we now have and for making mistakes that we got to learn from. Teachers because they have knowledge and take time and effort to teach us, Grnadparents for the reasons above and because I love them!: "Ode to Grandparents" oh no offence there, Ode to my Parents too! ;)
But back to Authority: I think being in the USA has made me lose a little respect when it comes to authority. I realised this change when I was trying to write a formal letter in Dutch to a professor at the University of Utrecht and wondering if the way I was adressing him was not too formal. I eventually decided that I'd rather be too formal then not at all, but it felt wierd using ways of writing in Dutch that in Enlgish I do not. I do definitely think it depends a lot on who your are talking to and what you are talking about. I remeber flinching at a look from my waterpolo coach when I just joined the National Waterpolo team. Now however, 100 experiences later and three coaches down the line I find that I know more on the subject and have a bigger input and even though I have respect I will stand up for my own more often as well. When it comes to things that I do not know anything about or have no controll over I once again feel like the first day in my goal: "You are ******** here to block shots SO DO IT!" No questions asked, no if's or but's.
Certainly we both learned from that experience because there is such a thing as too much respect but, having come from there I believe people, aspecially in America, have a lot to catch up on. I believe if people had some more respect for starters for elders and also for everyone else around them there would be a lot less crime misunderstanding and other out of controll situations in the world and a lot less suffering.
And so she stated.
Music: Rasmus-Sail Away
Quote: "Respect a man, he will do the more." -James Howell
posted by Nooy at Saturday, March 04, 2006
3 Comments:
I'm impressed!
love you,
Ah, life is being corny again! "Where is the love", the Black Eyed Peas song, was on the radio when I read this post of yours. The irony!
Anyway, just to add my two cents to this, I think you are thinking the wrong thing with the right feelings. That's a bit of an odd line there, but let me try to explain a little.
There's several layers of respect ofcourse, and lots of ways to show that you respect others. Most, however, have far more to do with how you view your position in life then what you think others deserve.
Should you adress others in a different way just because they were lucky enough to be born wiser, stronger or earlier then you? Should you let others use different ways to adress you because of any of those reasons?
Well, I love to think we're all equal. No matter what age, no matter what degree and especially, no matter what race. To me, everyone is equal and I am not using different ways to adress someone unless they ask me to do so.
That's the way I show respect. I treat anyone as though he or she is a friend.
Hoi Meike, I'm impressed:-) Your " Respect for Authority, " came just on the right moment.
Kiss, Boy (still didn't forget you)
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